• Satire & Humor

    NYE life advice from my 101-year-old Chinese grandma

    Jennifer: What’s the secret to long life? Grandma: You have my genetics. Jennifer: What’s the most important thing in life? Grandma: Everything is important. Nothing is important. Jennifer: What did you like to do when you were young? Grandma: There was no like. I just did what was here. (After thinking) I liked chemistry. I wanted to study it in university. But then the Japanese invaded China during World War II and I went back home. Jennifer: Why did you marry late in life? Grandma: I don’t know. Jennifer: How did you meet your husband? Did you marry for love, or was it arranged? Grandma: We were introduced. It was…

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  • Featured,  Satire & Humor

    Hi, I’m a recovering personal development addict

    Hi, I’m Jennifer, a recovering personal development addict from San Francisco. For years, I struggled to develop a sense of self-worth. I never felt like I was reaching my potential. I looked at my peers, and it seemed like I was the only one not deadlifting 1,000 pounds, making $58,000 in one hour, or invited to Leonardo DiCaprio’s yacht party every Saturday night. I bought course after course. I spent thousands of dollars on coaches who promised results — but mostly got me an emptier bank account. Anytime I read sales copy, I couldn’t resist the urge to click the shiny button that said “YES! I want to double my…

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  • Satire & Humor

    #NowHiring: Fake husband on temp basis

    My mom wants me to get married ASAP and it’s stressing me out. SO #nowhiring: fake husband on temp basis willing to have a fake marriage and 2 fake babies and buy a fake house in a fake suburb. REQUIREMENTS: -Willing to travel and be available 1 weekend/month in SF Bay Area for show and tell with parents -Willing to have a fake divorce once we find the real husband. You’ll get fake custody of the 2 fake kids and fake house afterwards -Must be Chinese, ages 31-34, and a doctor. Psychologists do not count. May consider attorneys or engineers. -Demonstrate stability, strong work ethic, and good income generation -Fluency in…

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  • Featured,  Satire & Humor

    Follow your passion. And screw following your passion.

    Follow your passion. Screw following your passion. Do what you’re good at. Do what you are. No, do what you love. Do something. Do anything. Slow down and do nothing. Follow your curiosity. Learn to focus. Focus on the right things. Stop focusing, open yourself to new things. Trust yourself. Trust the system. Trust my science. Trust my research. Trust your instinct. Trust your intuition. Trust no one. Trust the universe. Build a system. Build habits. Build routines. Be open to randomness. Spend money on experiences, not things. No, get more money so you can have more. Chuck it all, sell it all, and travel the world. Learn a new…

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  • Satire & Humor

    The 3 kinds of people you’ll find at a gym

    Here are my observations of the kinds of people you will find at a gym depending on the time of day: The early morning crowd: If you want to network with high-powered people, this is it. CEOs, senior executives, and otherwise intense individuals hit the gym before half the world is even awake. They’re the ones who get shit done and somehow have it all together. The number of times I’ve worked out alongside my company’s CEO and other senior execs is astonishing. The lunchtime crowd: Made up of lots of women who take group fitness classes. Interestingly, they seem to be primarily women who are either ashamed of their bodies…

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